Thursday, April 23, 2009

Glutton for punishment

Subtitled: I am an idiot.

So Tuesday Everette told me he was going to the Young Life Thankathon on Thursday at 6:30 (rember this for later). It is basically when all YL student leaders and metro committee members (that's Everette) call every sponser to thank them for donating to young life. Everette asked me if I would be willing to make brownies or cookies. It wasn't a big deal, but it might be nice. No pressure. I thought I had enough time and it wouldn't be a big deal (there are 50 student leaders). So I bought some brownie mixes with all the best intentions.
They never happened. But I still couldn't let it go. So at 4 PM today (remember 6:30) I decided I could "whip" up a batch of oatmeal cookies. Anyone remember how cookies are my specialty?!
I was inspired and decided I could make two different kinds out of the same basic mix. Chocolate chip/m&m (what you get when you only have two partial bags and you have to combine). And Craisins and peanuts. Not a bad combo.
Here is something else I forgot to mention. At 8 PM some friends from church who are getting married were coming over to meet with us about pictures and audio for the ceremony.
They were coming to my house, a house that I already cleaned once.
I remembered this when I dropped my third mixing bowl into the sink.
Too Late! Oh yeah, at 5 I had to start making dinner too! Plus Jonathan was running around dragging every Tupperware and utensil out of it's respective cabinet and drawer, using every toy possible, not to mention climbing on the chair, to the table!
So as I kept trucking on the cookies, I threw together some stir-fry. However, the cookies I made on the airbake pan spread out super thin (because the butter was too soft) and turned to baked on sludge (delicious sludge--to be sure, but sludge nonetheless). This was when I decided that I HATE HATE HATE airbake pans and I threw them in the trash (when Everette asked why I didn't donate them to goodwill I told him because then I would have had to scrape the baked on sludge off of the pans AND wash them, this cut down on clean up). So I threw the dough in the freezer as well as the empty regular pans (in an effort to cool them down before baking more cookies). The 8 dozen cookies (minus the baked sludge) were finished and I was trying to find a container to put them in, I kept misjudging the quantity and it took me three tries to find a container they would all fit in. The other two ended up, where else? In the sink.
Dinner was ready and at this moment Jonathan had a major meltdown. He was in his chair throwing a fit about food. Everette was going toe-to-toe with him, and I was feeling very much like this...
So I took the opportunity to step out into the garage take a few deeps breaths and waited for the crying to stop and I felt more like this...
And I walked back into the kitchen.

We ate and Everette ran out the door. I turned around and saw this...
Then I looked at the clock, it was 6:30. Then I looked at my son's disgusting black fingernails.
Then I looked for a place to hide. I climbed under the table. Then the dog licked me, then I remembered that the dog sometimes eats poop. Then I sighed and climbed out from under the table. Then I sighed again.

So I did an old trick. I set the timer for 15 minutes, telling myself that after 15 minutes I would go up and put jonathan to bed, and change my clothes. I can endure anything for 15 minutes.
So I started loading the dishwasher and washing the dishes in the sink, I started wiping the counters when I looked up at the time thinking, "surely 15 minutes is up by now" I had 7 minutes left.
A few minutes after the timer beeped, I was finished with the kitchen and ready to take my kid up to the tub. Now my kitchen looks like this...
(For the record, this is not really my kitchen. Like I had time to actually take a photo of my kitchen before OR after! But this one is pretty isn't it?)

I even picked up all the toys Jonathan had spread across the floor. It was only 6:50. I had time to rest for a few minutes after Jonathan went to bed and before I had to start the coffee and review my notes.
All in a day's work.
This is called "irony".


melissa said...

You are an inspiration! This is the most entertaining blog I've read in a while, by the way. :)

darcilyna said...

loved the play by play... i think i need to get into the habit of hiding when i'm stressed... i have a bad habit of just yelling...but hiding and taking a deep breath would be more beneficial to everyone i think

Annie said...

Somehow I missed this post... Thanks for the timer tip. I can see how that could make anything bearable. Like perhaps the mountains of laundry and dishes that I thought I'd tackle this morning, since I'm staying home with a sick Lucy, while Bob & Caroline are at church.

bethany said...

at first glance that picture really DOES look like your kitchen! you could have fooled me. i'm just glad this story had a happy ending. i was getting anxious just reading it.

amberbahler said...

I thought it was your kitchen too...and then I thought "WOW, she really has a nice kitchen and I never noticed it that really her kitchen??"...and then I read the caption.