Monday, March 3, 2008

From the overflow of the heart-the mouth speaks

Frightening how true this is. And amazing how quickly those words can impact your whole day.
Everette and I had a full weekend, and on top of that all three of us are sick to varying degrees.
After a night of fitful sleep-due to congestion, this morning Jonathan was lying in bed with us. Normally he goes right back to sleep. But today for what ever reason he was awake and noisy. Everette and I were both tired and frustrated that we weren't able to go back to sleep. Everette only had about 30 mins before he had to get up for work, and he asked me to take Jonathan out of the room so he could rest (he also is leaving town this afternoon). Before I could even think, a self-righteous, indignant, arrogant and resounding "No"-came out of my mouth. My first thoughts were-who does he think he is? Why should I have to get up and leave. As soon as it came out-I regretted it. I should get up and leave, because, I could come back later in the day and sleep, and because I would be sleeping there tonight-while he would be up late in meetings and sleeping in a strange bed. So now this is how our day has begun. Everette is grumpy because I was quite rude to him, I feel terrible, selfish, and wanting to rewind the day and start over. THis time I get out of bed with Jonathan, since I wasn't sleeping anyway. Here's hoping we can salvage some of the day before Everette leaves. I hate it when we fight before he leaves. It always seems so stupid an unimportant later.

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